It's been a while since I had a moment to sit down and write a blog. Nicer weather means I'm out walking and playing with my family. Since mother's day is this weekend thought I'd ramble on about mothers for a minute.
Love your mother and tell her daily and for coffee sakes appreciate her. *Unless your mom is truly legit a piece then find someone who was like a mother influence and appreciate her.)
I've only been a mother for 16 months now. It's the best thing to ever happen to me. There's no greater love that I have ever experienced than the love I have for my beautiful son. Honestly, becoming a mother has been my first experience truly with selfless love. There's nothing I wouldn't do for Jack, or to be the best possible version of myself for him. I want to change the world and make it better and the people of it better. I want to change the stars for him. I want to teach him everything there is to be learned, I want him to be greater than myself and even bigger dreams than my own. It's this world that I never experienced until I saw my son. Everything changes.
Motherhood is hard. I'm exhausted all the time. No matter how much sleep I get or how many cups of coffee I have. I'm tired. My body isn't the same. Granted it was never anything to brag about, but being pregnant has such a toll on your body. It's worth it all. I think and worry about Jack all the time. What can I do to make his life greater, am I doing enough? Did I hug him enough? am I doing enough to help him grow and learn? Am I holding him back? How am I going to pay for college? What if he wants to be in sports how will I afford that? What if he doesn't make friends? what if he makes the wrong friends? Did he get enough to eat? Did he eat too much? Do I spend enough time with him? Am I giving him a good environment to grow?
Maybe that's why I'm so exhausted.
Being a mother, especially in the younger days you will be head bumped, punched, pinched, bit, hair pulled, glasses ripped off, knocked in the mouth, pulled on, scratched. But you will also be hugged, and kissed, and tackled with love. Once again. It's all worth it.
You'll be covered in food that you didn't eat, snot, pee and poop. You'll be up chasing them from harmful stunts or getting into places and things they shouldn't
I feel like I'm always cleaning just for my house to look like a F5 tornado came whirling through. Once again, maybe that's why I'm exhausted.
How about those mothers who are wives too, another person to try to save attention and patience for after being hit, scratched, bit, food thrown on, chased after, fought with, picked up, cleaned,dusted,vacuumed, did laundry, with at the end of the day with a list of things to still do after bedtime.
I'm exhausted. In the best way. I have two amazing people that I share my home with. There's days where I don't feel appreciated but I know that they do, even if they don't show it and I know there's days where I don't appreciate the things my husband does, or the things that make up my life because I'm always so focused on the future and how I'm going to change it, create it., that I forget to enjoy the present and live in this beautiful moment that I have.
I'm a mother. My hair is a mess, my clothes are never tidy, I'm forgetful due to my busy mind. I'm tired, I'm loved, I'm blessed, I'm busy. I do everything that I do because I love being a mother. On top of it all I get the best and most amazing little boy to be the mother of. Talk about double whammy right?
Its the most amazing feeling in the world. I love being a mother
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